Two days later...

School ended two days ago. Freshman year wasn't too bad. I had my ups and downs. I had my stress and my fun. There's so much I didn't post on here that happened. Maybe I should post it. The times of swimming and parties and tests and love. The times of giving up and giving in and waiting. But I'm not going to post those stories. Those are memories that will last a lifetime, memories that will always stay with me. Those are memories I'll keep to myself in my head. Re-live them through pictures and stories with other people. I'm not gonna post 'em. (sorry).

As I was reading through the things people said in my yearbook, I realized something. Though I may say I have no friends, I'm wrong. I DO have friends. So many of them. I've read so many messages from people telling me how awesome I am. One girl wrote,

"Thank you for being yourself all the time! You never try to be someone you're not and I really respect that about you!"

That just, made me smile. :) I DO strive to be someone who's not everyone else, no matter how many times people tell me to "be normal". Now I'm not trying to go into some educational lesson about not giving in to peer pressure or anything, nor am I trying to brag. I'm just saying, being myself is the best thing I can do. Not wearing the same clothes in a month and not wearing my hair the same twice isn't what it's all about. It's about how I've acted and reacted to the obstacles thrown in my way. It's about how I portray myself and what people think of me. I've changed SO much this year. My braces came off, I got bangs,  I've become a stronger dancer and a stronger person. I remember in elementary school and in middle school how I thought everyone judged me. I've realized how insecure I actually was. This year made me realize, nobody really cares. Nobody cares if you wear earrings for the first time or if you bring in a whole jug of chocolate milk to lunch. Nobody really cares if you tweet a thousand times a day or if you can dance your ass off. Nobody really cares about the little things on the outside, they care about the little things on the inside. Though I may have treated a few people like bullshit, and people have treated me like bullshit, I know that I don't care and they don't care. 

...I forget the point I'm trying to make but basically, what I'm saying, is that being myself is just better. This year I've learned a lot. I sure as fuck learned a  a lot about the Civil War and Shakespeare, but do I remember that stuff? Hell no! I've learned a lot about how people are and what to do and not to do. I've learned some vital life lessons, and I respect that.

This year has been just, crazy. The days went by slow, but the weeks and months went by like that *snap*. I did waste a lot of time doing nothing, thanks to the internet. But the times I wasn't on the internet were the best. Minus the stressful study sessions at midnight and the stupid drama that people pulled me in to, haha. Those times are the ones I'll remember and re-live. I don't have a best friend, but I do have friends. Many friends. Hopefully I can maintain those friendships and come back 30-some years later and re-live the moments. 

That's about it for my last post for Freshman Year. I'm officially now a Sophomore! I might have a Sophomore Year blog, but I can;t decide now. It's summer!

Oh and one more thing: Fuck all of you...

I love you guys!

Scott we need to hang..

~Alex[andra]